Photo courtesy of the Everett Collection

Rory Gilmore did nothing wrong

May 7, 2024

Okay, so obviously she did some things wrong. But I don’t think that Rory deserves the amount of hate that she gets from fans of the show.

“Gilmore Girls” follows the lives of Lorelai and Rory Gilmore, an iconic mother-daughter duo. Lorelai had Rory when she was only 16 years old, so it’s clear from the beginning of the show that they have a close bond and, at times, act more like best friends than mother and daughter. Throughout the show, we see Rory grow up and navigate through high school and college.

This period in life is a time when many people make poor decisions in the hopes of “finding themselves” and figuring out how they want to spend the rest of their lives. Because of this journey through adolescence, Rory has become one of the most hated and criticized characters on the show.

People should stop judging Rory so heavily for her mistakes, because in reality no one should be judged for the silly mistakes they made as young adults. People should not be judged based on their worst moments, especially when they, like Rory, had good intentions.

Most of the “bad” things that she does are just a result of her learning and growing up. Rory lived an extremely sheltered life with her mother, and when she enters the real world, she messes up quite a few times. And of course she makes mistakes, because she is an extremely realistic character considering everything that she has been through.

Rory is heavily criticized by viewers for her romantic relationships. The relationship that she gets the most backlash for is her first boyfriend, Dean – but it’s not for what happens between them in high school.

Dean gets married during Rory’s freshman year of college. The two exes remain friends, but their dynamic becomes complicated as both clearly still have feelings for each other. In one of the show’s worst moments, Rory loses her virginity to her now married ex-boyfriend.

The moment is hard to watch and becomes even more cringey when she is immediately met by her mother, who is horrified by the situation.

Yes, what Rory did was immature. It was an incredibly selfish moment of weakness and was probably one of her worst decisions. But a first love can make even the smartest people act crazy. Cheating is never okay, especially with a married man, but there were two people in that bed and it was clear that Dean took control of the situation in order to get what he wanted from Rory.

An already-confused Rory is met right after this emotional moment by her mother who criticizes her on the issue. Regardless of the circumstances in which she lost her virginity, Rory deserved a moment of peace in order to process her own feelings before Lorelai pushed her own opinions onto her daughter.

Moving on to one of Rory’s most discussed “faults” and most misunderstood moments: dropping out of Yale.

Picture this: your whole life and personality are derived from your success in school. You complete school assignments with ease, transfer to a strict private school, become valedictorian basically in your sleep and then get into all your dream colleges.

Two years later, you land the perfect internship with your boyfriend’s dad at a major newspaper and life seems to be going well. One day, a high-ranking man in your field of work says that you don’t have what it takes to pursue your dream job and that you would be better off as an assistant. I, too, would question my whole sense of self, and you’re lying if you say you would be any different.

The moral of the story is that we need to stop judging people for the decisions that they make as they are still growing up, and “Gilmore Girls” becomes the perfect example of why this is necessary. Rory has many admirable qualities that are the core of who she is, and that is what matters. She’s a realistic example that not everything will always go to plan. Sometimes things will be your fault – but everything broken can be fixed, and you can be better for it in the end.

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